What’s on Your Plate?
I’ve taken 3 months off from Blogging because I had too much on my plate. Now that things are winding down with the extra commitments I’ve taken on due to my daughter getting a role in a play, my son starting baseball season, and the regular routine of work and life commitments, I’ve re-committed to regular weekly or bi-weekly blogging to support super busy people and delivery of my e-newsletter twice monthly.
Ironically, during March, a colleague had advised me to use my expertise to develop a timely program specifically for Administrative Professionals during Administrative Professionals week the end of April. I came up with a program called “There’s Too Much on My Plate” that helps super busy professionals clearly acknowledge everything on their plate and begin taking ownership and control for everything there is to manage at work and home.
I had the pleasure of visiting American Standard and delivering a keynote to inspire better control of the balancing act. And, now, I’m working with teams at several key corporations to deliver customized programs to meet the needs of their super busy administrative professionals.
One thing I learned first-hand from the last few months is the absolute importance of staying very focused on the most important things and declining other requests and opportunities. Even when there was time to attend another meeting or networking event in the evening, I found that by pushing and having too much on my plate, I was exhausted and wasn’t able to apply the focus and energy to those things that mattered most.
When deciding what’s most important, realize that it may not be forever, but it’s for now. My daughter’s had rehearsal for her play usually 3 days a week for 2-4 hours at a time almost an hour from home. I often brought work with me to do while I waited, dialed into a conference call for my own professional development, or shopped in the local area. It was a great experience for her but the lesson for me, put more boundaries around my time, seek more help, and accept the help that’s offered. And, importantly, negotiate expectations, communicate fully, and be fully present where ever I am.
As my program for “There’s Too much on My Plate” continues to evolve, I will have many experiences to share from participants and from my own experiences. Stay tuned!!
Sincerely yours,
Coach Natalie Gahrmann
natalie@nrgcoaching.com
Women in Leadership
I read an article in the Star Ledger last week (Thursday, Feb. 22) titled “Ms.-Fortune for women in leadership: Slip from long-term trend; state’s top ranks suffer loss”.
The trend I read about in the article regarding the decreasing number of women at top leadership positions is disappointing. Although this wasn’t something that I ever wanted, I know many powerful and bright corporate women who could fill corporate officer and board director positions. Fact is, we even have our first women (a mother!!) running for the Presidency and a somewhat slow growing number of women in government leadership positions at the local, state, and national levels.
However, in the Fortune 500 companies the numbers of women in officer positions shrank from 16.4 % in 2005 to 15.6 % in 2006. And, where I live (NJ), we can no longer claim a single one of the 23 women CEOs in the Fortune 1000 since Lucent’s Patricia Russo transferred to Paris to retain her job with France’s Alcatel when the companies merged.
My experience working with women in the highest leadership positions reveals the ambivalence these women sometimes face between wanting to climb the corporate ladder and wanting to be with their kids more. The demands of higher level positions are usually heavy and difficult for those with a family. Many of the women in the highest leadership positions have partners who stay home with the kids and/or full-time live-in nannies who handle much of the childcare and household responsibilities.
Women are the ones who have the kids and are genetically set to do most of the nurturing. Women leaders tend to make many sacrifices. “Work/life balance is a big challenge; we are the ones who have the kids, and that’s not going to change. Corporate careers are complex and women have a lot of choices, and that’s a good thing; if we want more women to stay
More and more women are opting out of corporate America and starting their own business where they can set their own path and achieve more of what they want when they want it!
I’m curious, what are your thoughts about the decline in top leadership positions by women? Would this be something you’d want? Email me to share your views.
Yours,
Coach Natalie Gahrmann
natalie@nrgcoaching.com
Re-aligning your Priorities in your Super Busy Life
If you find there’s little time left at the end of the day, you’re not alone! Here’s a remedy I found on the internet (Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Indra_Books) for those who want to maximize their time:
1. First evaluate the amount of time you actually spend working, commuting, sleeping, eating, spending time with your family, attending children’s activities (i.e. baseball, dance lessons) , running errands, visiting friends/relatives, making purchases, etc.
2. Make a list of all of the things you do that take up the non-work related remaining hours
3. Sort the tasks by type of activity. Feel free to make up your own categories.
o Family
o Home Repairs/Maintenance
o Errands/Shopping
o Social Activities
o School Activities
o Other
4. Asterick the ones you would rather not do.
5. Estimate how much time it takes you to do each task (per week).
6. Make a list of all of the things that are on the perpetual “to do” list that never seem to get done. Sort this list, as well. (Having things that are constantly waiting to be done, does nothing but add stress to your life.)
7. Now here comes the difficult part. Giving up control to get control. You are really going to have to put on your positive change attitude to make this work. Ready???? If so, circle the items that can be hired out. The possibilities are endless. If you are serious about change, then you will not be making excuses at this point as to why someone else cannot do the job. Do NOT, use money as an excuse at this point. You can’t afford to do that. This is your life you are talking about. Here are some suggestions:
o Lawn Care
o Home Repair Specialists (painters, handyman etc)
o Errand Service
o Personal Shopper/Concierge
o Nanny/Babysitter
o Car Specialists
o Financial Specialists
8. Make another list of things you would like to do but never have time to do.
9. If you successfully completed Step 7, you should now be able to make a new list of things to do each week that include your “wants.” Can you replace the “have to” items with the “want to” items? If you answered yes, you did a great job and are well on your way to taking back control of your life. If you answered no, then we still have some work to do.
Now some of you are probably saying, this is easy for her to say. Well, no it isn’t. I have helped many clients do this so that they can have time for the items at the top of their priority list. I, myself, had to hire out some things in my business that I don’t have the skills or expertise to handle and I really don’t enjoy doing.
Stop now and take stock of your life and priorities. You may find that when you reprioritize you only need some reorganization or you might have bigger problems that would benefit from the regular commitment with a professional coach, organizer, or life management consultant.
If we at N-R-G Coaching Associates can be of assistance, please contact us to discuss your needs.
Best regards,
Coach Natalie
Fighting Addiction
A newspaper article last month described how, in an ironic role reversal, many professional working parents, when home, are sneaking their Blackberries (or a similar device) into the closet or the bathroom to check e-mail so their children and spouses don’t catch them. These parents are e-mailing while at their kids’ school events and at home during “family time” (including dinner.) In shame they take to hiding their dirty “habit.”
The Blackberry (also unaffectionate called “CrackBerry” because of its sometimes addictive nature) is a hand-held device that provides 24/7 connection to your job. The Blackberries are the workplace cyber tool of the new millennium which enables you to always be in touch with work e-mail and the Internet. It can be both a blessing and a curse.
It can be intrusive and can eliminate any remaining boundaries of work-life balance, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Life is full of choices and any tool can be misused or abused. A shovel is a marvelous invention, but you wouldn’t use it to clear snow off your car’s windshield — or at least not very often. Some employees or managers have addictive or obsessive-compulsive personalities and get hooked on things like this.
So, beware of your possible addiction to these tools and know that you’ve probably gone too far when you take it to bed with you in fear that you might miss something important! Set reasonable limits and boundaries so that it’s a tool to help increase your effectiveness not a device that always needs to be on and ruling your life!
Work-Life Initiatives
In analyzing the needs of today and tomorrow’s workforce, work-life balance is high on the list of issues facing both employers and employees. It is a critical issue at the forefront for both families and for Corporate America (actually not just Corporate America…it’s a global issue!)
Balance is really about being in control and feeling comfortable with your choices not about a juggling act. There are numerous studies I have read. They indicate a direct correlation between strong support of work-life balance practices and positive employee retention, productivity, and customer service ratings. Even so, work-life balance is not simply something a company can do for its individual employees. It also includes what individuals do for themselves in attaining meaningful achievement and enjoyment in everyday life.
However, keep in mind some inherent realities I picked up from a BLOG called “Brother in Arms” that I tend to agree with wholeheartedly:
• Not everything is of equal importance in your life, and perfect balance probably does not mean equality.
• Your life is constantly changing and you constantly need to reallocate your resources.
• Things happen that are out of your control, but it is up to you to respond to these external forces.
• Change in one area probably impacts all others, so be flexible and proactive.
• Recognize and accept that you will probably drop a ball or two now and then.
Explore your corporate and organizational work-life initiatives. When both company and employee efforts are complementary and sincere, true work-life balance can be achieved.
Workplace Policies for Super Busy Parents
Just this week, a new study came out with Harvard and McGill University researchers saying that “workplace policies for families in the United States are weaker than those of all high-income countries and many middle- and low-income countries.” In a related article in USA Today, it was reported that the US lags the rest of the world in government support for family oriented work policies.
“More countries are providing the workplace protections that millions of Americans can only dream of,” said the study’s lead author, Jody Heymann, founder of the Harvard-based Project on Global Working Families and director of McGill’s Institute for Health and Social Policy.
Among the study’s findings:
* The U.S. is one of only five countries out of 173 in the survey that does not guarantee some form of paid maternity leave; the others are Lesotho, Liberia, Swaziland and Papua New Guinea.
* Fathers get paid paternity leave or paid parental leave in 65 countries, including 31 offering at least 14 weeks of paid leave. The U.S.: none.
* At least 107 countries protect working women’s right to breast-feed; the breaks are paid in at least 73 of them. The U.S.: no federal legislation guaranteeing the right to breast-feed at work.
* At least 145 countries provide paid sick days, with 127 providing a week or more annually. The U.S. provides unpaid leave through the Family and Medical Leave Act, which does not cover all workers; there is no federal law providing for paid sick * * At least 126 countries have laws mandating that employers give workers a day of rest each week. The U.S. does not have a maximum work week length or a limit on mandatory overtime per week.
Truth is, the US leaves it up to companies to decide what kinds of benefits, including family-oriented ones, to offer to workers. The belief is that in a free market, if perks like these are really desired by enough workers then companies will offer them.
Many big companies in the US offer lots of family-friendly benefits, but this study shows that in the aggregate we lag way behind the rest of the world.
It’s time for American companies to step up!
Managing the Homefront in your Super Busy life
I’ve been coming across more and more women who have husbands who have left the work force to be home with the kids. For some, this is the perfect solution. This tends to work real well when there are more career opportunities and ambition by the woman but a desire to have the children primarily cared for by their parents.
What I find happens in some cases is sort of a disconnect. There’s somewhat of a role reversal to the former traditional model of the father as the bread-winner for the family. This may create feelings of resentment, jealousy, frustration on the negative side or feelings of appreciation, support, encouragement on the positive side. Neither feelings are right or wrong.
The problem comes when these feelings are not discussed honestly and openly. Someone feeling negatively really needs to be heard. Otherwise, this may adversely effect the relationship, and ultimately the family unit.
Many of the women I know who are the bread-winners of their family tend to be controlling. Not necessarily a ‘control-freak’ or not necessarily consciously but by default. Husbands in the role of a stay-at-home dad may relinquish their role and behave in a subservient manner. The frustration for women comes when they not only work long hours in their career but are also expected to oversee or manage the household despite having someone capable at home.
I don’t think there are any quick solutions but a need for constant communication. Both parents need to be clear about their roles and contributions to the family unit. They need to be in touch with their feelings and recognize when they’re not feeling good about something; then address it without placing blame or judgment.
Beings this seems to be a growing area of interest and concern, I’d love to hear from those of you in this type of situation. Please email me to describe your situation as well as what’s working and what’s not. I’ll continue updating a BLOG discussion on this topic as I hear from more of you.
Thanks,
Coach Natalie
Small Business survey results
Employees of small businesses say work-life balance is better than large companies. The main benefit of working at a small business is a good work-life balance, according to a recent employee survey by Salary.com as reported at Inc.com on January 30, 2007.
Salary.com’s latest small business survey reveals that despite a perceived gap in pay at small businesses other factors like work/life balance mean workers want to remain working at smaller companies.
Employees said there were several reasons they remained at small businesses, other than compensation. Forty-six percent said it was because of better work/life balance, 38 percent said it was the commute and 34 percent noted loyalty as a reason.
Benefits and opportunities for advancement, in addition to pay, were cited as advantages of working for large companies. Other advantages included a better commute, loyalty, a good boss, and positive relationships with co-workers, survey respondents said.
At the same time, some three-quarters according to the survey results.
Reclaiming Energy
I’ve mentioned the other two things you can do to create more life balance in my past BLOGs. I wrote about gaining self awareness and making choices based on knowing who you are and what you want. This third thing is just as simple. It doesn’t require you to trek off into a distant land, search for some big guru somewhere, or take any more time out of your already Super Busy life!
The more you become aware and the more you make choices based on your awareness of your self, the more energy and power you naturally create and experience in your life. It’s that simple!
You can reclaim your energy when you start making decisions based on what’s really most important to you in your life. I said it was simple, but I didn’t say it was easy. Making choices often requires sacrifice or commitment. It also requires dedication to making things work.
When I left my career in the corporate world 10 years ago I made a very tough choice. I knew at that time that I really wanted to be the primary person raising my two kids. I chose to leave a job with high earnings and some potential. I chose to take a risk. My husband and I chose to simplify our life, especially our spending, so that we could make things work. It wasn’t easy. Fact is, it was very scary, especially at first when I signed the paper for my voluntary package. I didn’t have a plan, I just knew in my heart that the opportunity to leave happened for a reason and I felt compelled to make the choice to take in and see where the road would leave me.
I’m glad I made that choice back then. It created the change that energized me to use my strengths and passions to start my business. I don’t think I would have otherwise chosen to be a coach, a speaker, or a writer but I am so glad I did!
Making the right choices for you and for your life can energize you, too! Coaching can help and I’d love to be your coach to help you discover your self, make choices, and bring new energy and power into your life. Let me know when you’re ready!
Best regards,
Coach Natalie
The Power of Choice
So many people limit their choices because they feel they have none. They are stuck by “golden handcuffs” (high salary, benefits, stock options, etc.) that keep them in a position they are very unsatisfied with. I believe people always have choices but that every choice comes with consequences, both good and bad. Sometimes it’s the consequences that we fear that keep us stuck, but we do have choices!
One of my former clients, Barbara, felt slightly dissatisfied with her career opportunities at her job. At about the same time, she was getting calls from headhunters about other possibilities. She didn’t consider any of them because she had a number of years vested in her current company. As we talked about her situation, she decided that there was no harm in exploring her options. So, she spoke with a potential employer and decided to interview with them. She flew from North Carolina to Dallas to meet with the other company. She found that they were willing to offer her more money and career growth than what she had. As she reviewed the offer and evaluated it, we discussed her options and concerns. We found that although it seemed like a lucrative offer, relocating her family and starting over wasn’t something she really wanted to do….not even for the large sum of money they were offering to her.
Barbara chose to stay with her employer, but after the experience and gaining more self awareness about what was really important to her, she chose to meet with her management to propose changes in her job. They accepted her proposal and she was glad she chose to stay…even 7 years later when I touched base with her to see how she was doing!
We all have the power of choice in our own lives. When we don’t make choices, we’re not really in control of our own life.
We can choose to release what drains us and embrace what nourishes us. Realizing your life is the consequences of your choices becomes very empowering. If what you’re doing isn’t working for you, choose to change it!
Coach Natalie can help you make choices by being a sounding board and helping you explore your possiblities, brainstorming options, and empowering you to take control of your life.
Want to explore your options….take this assessment and see if you’re ready for coaching!
Here’s to you and the choices you make in your life!!
Yours truly,
Coach Natalie
