Procrastination Busters

Prune your to-do list of the non-essential items you know you’ll never do.
For that must-do task you’ve been putting off, just do it – ideally, the first thing in the morning. This frees your mental energy – often, not-doing something drains you more than doing it.

Identify a part of the disliked task that’s fairly pleasant – such as calling a colleague for information – and do that first, to get your feet wet. Or make a list of the various steps involved.

Schedule hunks of time to tackle work that requires concentration. Actually make an appointment with yourself. Let voice mail pick up your calls. You’ll make a lot of headway in a short time.

If the task is really objectionable, promise yourself you’ll tackle it just for 10 minutes, then if it’s killing you, you can stop. You may find it’s not so bad and can easily keep going until finished..

If you want to avoid being distracted by email or the internet, put your computer behind you. You’ll have to swivel around in your chair to check your email for the umpteenth time, or to Google something you’re only mildly curious about. Going to the computer will now be a conscious decision.

Avoid the temptation to shift from one half-finished task to another. This task-hopping is a form of stealth procrastination that many of us do without knowing it.

For digitally managing tasks with sub-tasks, watch for our upcoming article “Use Outlook to Keep Track of Multi-Part Tasks” in the next issue of this eLetter.

Some of the best procrastination advice is from Alan Lakein – pre-tech era, but still excellent.

Reprinted with permission from Jan Jasper. (c) Jan Jasper 2009. www.janjasper.com. Jan Jasper is author of Take Back Your Time: How to Regain Control of Work, Information, and Technology, published by St. Martin’s Press.

Overcoming Perfectionism Paralysis

Paula Eder, PhD, The Time Finder Expert has a free ezine with her unique approach to finding time. In the 4/23 issue she explored tips for overcoming the insidious paralysis of perfectionism. She introduces action-oriented suggestions throughout her ezine which you can apply right away.

1. Perfectionism is a learned attribute that you can unlearn. You were not born a perfectionist. You learned perfectionistic behavior from others, and you can unlearn it now. Next time you hear your perfectionist voice, identify the original source, if you can. Was it from your family constellation or from how you saw people outside your family react to you? Or was it based on someone you modeled yourself after? Envision these perfectionist messages in a heavy sack of expectations you received, which you can now set down and leave behind.

2. When perfectionism leads to procrastination, replace it with a “better than perfect” goal. Inevitably, perfectionism will prevent you from attempting something, because you fear not doing it well enough. Remember, it is your own standards that are unrealistically lofty. If you feel stuck in a project, try replacing skyhigh expectations with a productive stretch, and then identify your next action step.

3. Release the shackles of perfectionism by naming the fear that serves as the lock. Tyrannical perfectionism both springs from and generates destructive fears. Identify the specific concerns that constrict you. Do you fear failure, or are you apprehensive about what will happen if you do succeed? The level of control that perfectionism promises is illusory. See if you can identify the illusions and replace them with realistic alternatives.

4. You needn’t victimize yourself with your own success. Once you have succeeded at a task, you may feel you have to meet ever-higher standards. This is sometimes referred to as “raising the bar syndrome”. Each effort leads only to demands for greater effort, until eventually you encounter the impossible challenge and inevitable defeat. Affirm that you remain fully in charge of your time and your goals, even as you move to a higher level of effectiveness.

5. Make friends with your mistakes. Perfectionists often judge mistakes as bad. In reality, mistakes present a valuable avenue for evolution. If you don’t risk enough to make these mistakes, how do you ever learn? Allow yourself the freedom to engage wholeheartedly,and enjoy the thrill of discovery!

Finally, recognize that your perfectionism is part of a deeply personal story that you are now free to rewrite. It derives ALL of its power from the meaning that you ascribe it. The more effectively you strip the symbolic importance from “perfection”,the less power perfectionism will have over you. To expose your perfectionism’s false promises, complete these sentences.

1. Doing something perfectly means I am _______________________.
2. When I don’t do something perfectly, then __________________.
3. The burden of perfectionism is _____________________________.

Exercise for overcoming perfectionism:

1. List 2 things you can do right now to reduce yourperfectionism. _____________________________ ____________________________

2. Describe how your life will change if you reduce your perfectionism. What will be the gains?
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(c) Copyright 2006-2009 Paula Eder, Ph.D. All rights reserved.

“Material used with permission from Paula Eder, Ph.D., who develops customized, practical guides to help individuals and organizations find time to achieve personal, professional,and academic goals, and achieve career success. Register for her free, Award-Winning E-Zine at http://www.findingtime.net

Set Realistic Expectations in Your Super Busy Life

I’ve been talking to many executive moms lately in preparation for an upcoming presentation. What I’m finding is that those with the highest rate of success in balancing and integrating their life have realistic expectations for themselves and others.

In one example, an executive level mom with boys ages 11 and 13 enjoys attending their baseball games. As soon as she receives their schedules at the start of the season, she puts every game on her calendar. She doesn’t plan on attending every game because that would be unrealistic to accomplish. However, she attends when she can and she makes sure she’s there when it’s a championship game. She is thankful for those she can make and doesn’t beat herself up for those she can’t.

In another example, another senior level working mom has decided that time for herself will involved others in her family. Rather than having time solely to herself on the weekends, she shares her time with her family as a conscious choice and not something she resents doing. She carves out time to read fiction stories when she craves time alone. Otherwise, her expectation is to limit her alone time because she prefers being with her husband and children.

Realistic expectations around housework, children’s behavior, work, travel/commuting time and even free time will help you stress less and enjoy more.

What can you be more realistic about?

Best regards,

Coach Natalie